Handling Sexual Perversion (3)
by Pastor Faith Oyedepo, Week 4, September, 2006
I welcome you to this last edition of the series of teaching of the month of May. I began this teaching on the very first week by examining sexual perversion on fornication and pre-marital sex. I said Perversion is a derogatory term for deviation from the original meaning or doctrine, literally ‘turning aside’ from what is perceived to be normal. I also defined fornication as any unlawful sexual intercourse between two unmarried man and unmarried woman. I went on to say that pre-marital sex is having a sexual intercourse before marriage and last week, we also examined God’s view on homosexuality and His prescribed remedy. I defined homosexual as one who is sexually attracted only to people of the same sex as oneself. Today, being the last edition, I shall be talking on God’s purpose of sex.
As we all know that God is a God of purpose and He never does anything without a purpose. Everything He created has a purpose why He created it. God created us male and female. We saw this in the Word of God, “So God created man in his own image, in the image of God created he him; male and female created he them (Genesis 1:27). It is also good to know that God gave man reproductive organs with which to function effectively in sexual relationship between husband and wife. There is therefore nothing unclean or dirty about sexual intercourse for the married. Marriage is only honourable only when the bed is undefiled. If sex is engaged before marriage, the honour is thereby taken away. Sexual intercourse is only within the context of marriage and it is a celebration of the covenant of marriage. God’s creation of sexual union was for good and not for evil. However, any good thing can be perverted when wrongly used. I have discussed so much on sexual perversions in our previous teachings.
I want you to know that God created man with certain basic physiological needs including sexual needs. But satisfying this urge ought to be done, decently and in order within the context of marriage. Satisfying the sexual urge in extra-marital context is contrary to God’s original purpose of it. God knew that man will not be able to live a successful holy life without satisfying this biological need. Marriage therefore, was instituted to meet this need, and at the same time, make it easy to live a holy life. This does not suggest that marriage is for people who cannot control themselves. The truth is that, if you cannot control your sexual drive while single, you will probably not be able to exercise control when you are married. That means you will be in serious temptation when your partner is not available. Self-control is a must, especially for the singles. I want us to examine in details God’s purpose for sexual relationship within the marriage institution.
God choose this unique method to replenish the earth and then commanded man to be fruitful, “And God blessed them, and God said unto them, Be fruitful, and multiply, and replenish the earth, and subdue it: and have dominion over the fish of the sea, and over the fowl of the air, and over every living thing that moveth upon the earth” (Genesis 1:28). He gave them reproductive organs with which to carry out this command. We are told in Genesis 4:1 that… And Adam had marital sex with his wife and she conceived (The Living Bible). This along with other scriptures proves that God designed marital sex for procreation. However, wisdom demand that you plan for the number of children you can raise in the fear of the Lord.
Talking to husband about how to relate with their wives physically, the book of Proverbs says, “Let thy fountain be blessed: and rejoice with the wife of thy youth. Let her be as the loving hind and pleasant roe; let her breasts satisfy thee at all times; and be thou ravished always with her love (Proverbs 5:18-19). God intended that apart from the purpose of procreation, marital sex should give pleasure. Statistics show that homes where husband and wife enjoy each other sexually are the happiest homes. For the breast of a man’s wife to satisfy him means for the two of them to have pleasure in marital sex. However, God expects married couples to give sexual satisfaction to each other. Sex, in the context of marriage is not dirty or sinful as some would have us believe. Marriage is a union of spirit, soul and body, so, it is therefore not complete when the physical aspect is missing. Sexual union between couples is not just a physical act, it is also a symbolic of the oneness of the spirit and soul, and of the mutual submission that God ordained it to be.
God’s Word says, “And it came to pass, when he had been there a long time, that Abimelech king of the Philistines looked out at a window, and saw, and, behold, Isaac was sporting with Rebekah his wife (Genesis 26:8). “ Sporting”, as has been suggested by Bible scholars, may not be marital sex or actual sexual relationship, but foreplay. It must have been intimate enough to suggest to Abimelec that Rebecca was Isaac’s wife. This, too, is a good and perfect gift from a good and perfect God. “Playing” intimately with your spouse is not wrong, but rather brings you closer.
The Bible uses the word “know” to describe the intimate, physical relationship between husband and wife. One of God’s intentions for marriage is for the couple to really know one another until they become truly one. The Bible says, For this cause shall a man leave father and mother, and shall cleave to his wife: and they twain shall be one flesh’ Wherefore they are no more twain, but one flesh (Matthew 195-6).
The joining to one’s spouse also, describes the act of sexual relationship. For as a man is joined in physical union to his wife, they will be very close to each other than any other person. It is only within the context of marriage that guilt does not accompany sexual intercourse. If both man and woman work at making the act of sex more than just an avenue for procreation or the releasing of tension, it becomes a means of enhancing intimacy. The act of sex is a fellowship — giving and receiving tender love. This is what brought comfort to Isaac after the death of his mother, Sarah. It provided a means of intimate fellowship with someone he loved “And Isaac brought her into his mother Sarah’s tent, and took Rebekah, and she became his wife; and he loved her: and Isaac was comforted after his mother’s death” (Genesis 24:67).
To avoid Fornication
One other reason why God designed the marriage bed is to ensure that man has a legitimate avenue for releasing sexual tension. Outside the sanctity of marriage, any sexual act, from petting to sporting is sin. God’s Word says, “Now concerning the things whereof ye wrote unto me: It is good for a man not to touch a woman. Nevertheless, to avoid fornication, let every man have his own wife, and let every woman have her own husband ( I Corinthians 7:1).
The first and important step you need to take to be free from immoral act of sin is to receive Jesus Christ as your Lord and Saviour. If this is your desire, then pray this prayer with me: “Dear Lord Jesus, I come to you today as a sinner. I believe you died for my sins and rose on the third day. Forgive me my sins. I accept you as my Lord and Saviour. Make me a child of God today”.